susankb's Xanga

Friday, October 13, 2006

Fri, 13 Oct 2006 03:17:34 GMT

Well, about six months ago when I was moving back to Dallas from Baton Rouge to continue physical therapy, see doctors and finish my master's from home I kept telling myself to look months ahead and maybe it would all calm down. I made this little goal for myself that things would turn around and be okay by the time I turned 25. "Life will start at 25," I told myself, hoping I could put this past year behind me and hopefully forget the pain; maybe even start working out again. Man, I miss that.

Ironically, here I am, one week from my 25th birthday and I'm about to start a new job, will sign a new lease and move soon, and have even started riding the bike a little bit. It did take the full six months and I'm not completely pain free but I've certainly made great strides and I really feel like maybe these are some new beginnings!! I'm off to New York next week to stay at the W Times Square for my first day at Google. Two weeks later I'll come home and find a place to live, get on a work routine and gear up for the first fall/winter holiday season where I'll really be in Dallas. I'm excited :) If I can just keep riding the bike and getting some exercise I really need to shed some of these pounds. Pray for freedom from pain and the ability to move my body. I'm still hopeful I'll make a full recovery!

Less than a week away from 25. Wow. 25. Can I really be 25?! It hardly seems possible. A lot of people go through quarter life crises, I know. For me, though, I'm just so excited to move on and get over this last phase of my life. I'm happy. I'll probably take 30 pretty hard, but for now, I'm okay.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Mon, 21 Aug 2006 01:27:04 GMT

Hi, hi, hi!

I've been avoiding blogging until my life gets back in some kind of managable order . . .but now that Bradlie has linked me to his blog under the title "sexy susan" I felt the need to at least acknowledge it. So, I'm alive. Still breathin, still here, still tryin to get back to normal. . . and I will say that I'm a hell of a lot closer than I've been in a good long while.

I'm gonna miss havin you in Texas now that I'm finally back, Bradlie. Our loss :)

Saturday, February 18, 2006

Sat, 18 Feb 2006 07:49:04 GMT

..stole this from Tasha:

Fill this out and place your college as the subject:

When you first attended, where did you live?
Third floor Mosher! Southside.

Who was/were your roommate(s)?
Laura Andries...which led to meeting Rachel, which led to meeting Lauren..which led to Tasha. awww seven degrees of badass.

Do you still talk to them?
umm or like five seconds on facebook...she moved to DC. she was a good roommate cuz we were both super messy. she had anne geddes and dance pictures everywhere....my side of the room was blacklight and eminem posters. awesome.

Ever get in trouble in the dorms?
not really...except when me and lauren tried to catch the dude that was freakin stalking me and leaving creepy messages and scaring the shit out of me

Something you remember when you lived on campus? the walk of shame through the commons after shacking before i figured out there was a side door to the rooms....meeting brian at stonewillies in the middle of the night...gathering to watch Temptation Island...circling the damn red lot for hours and then walking a mile back to the dorms...getting picked up in Mosher Circle....living off of pop-tarts, goldfish and beer (perhaps thats what led to the extra freshman 5000)

Your campus phone number or other number
no clue!

First party attended?
omg by far the worst party i attended of all time....out in the middle of f'n nowhere w/ a bunch of hicks who, no lie, thought it would be hilarious to order McDonalds (back in the day when they delivered 24/7) and pull a shotgun on the delivery guy...ummmm no. nothing about that is funny. i was super pissed. ironically, four years later i would go out with one of the guys that was at this party. thankfully, he wasnt friends wiht them but does remember me "pouting and being bitchy on the couch" ...well, duh.

actually, now that I'm thinking about it, that was the second. the first night, Jeff took me to my first visit of what would turn into many badass night of drinking games and barhopping at Kyle, Rick and Eddie's....and my first walk of shame :)

First bar you got wasted at?
either shadow canyon or that bar that changed names every year...it was a techno club at the tame

Favorite place to go out to eat?
Jason's Deli...duh. but i miss blue baker, too.

Did you go to the library?
not unless i was meeting a group or lauren talked me into it before finals. i dont like places i cant take my diet dr pepper

What was your favorite floor you'd always be on?
first for computer lab, second for studying/groups....definitely west campus...the main campus library smelled

Club, Athletics, Frat or Sororities, you joined?
was in Hospitality and Wiley freshman year...got to meet mikhail gorbachev and go on Bush campaign trip with wiley which was cool...hospitality sucked ass...I quit sophomore year when i was told I was acting inappropriately during a game of hot seat where i was asked (by a boy with a tongue ring) if I like guys with tongue rings and replied "only if he knows how to use it." scuse me for having a personality. later was in Fellows and helped start ABWA. both badass.

Where did you buy your books?
Rothers & Loupots

Who made the best wings?
i think chilis makes the best boneless wings b/c theyre just chicken nuggets in wing sauce...im with tasha on the whole no meat with bones thing...plus after a year of goldfish, poptarts and beer i needed to lay off the fried food

Favorite Bar?
oh i love them all...carney/blarney, ptar, the tap, and all the new bars on Northgate that opened the at the end of my college career...i really liked mad hatters...always got in trouble at salty dog...

Ever attend a sporting event?
ummm more than i go to at lsu....i definitely wish id gone to more baseball games

Ever attend a concert or comedic performance?
went to support Kamran a couple times, and went to the ballet with butt, fun bobby and his mom...or was that YOUR mom?

Have you ever spent the night on campus not in a dorm hall?
ummm pretty sure no

Favorite night to go out on, and where did you go?
Thursday, Friday, Saturday...i mean does it really matter what night you go out in college, it is always fun!

Happy hour, where did you go?
uhh didnt really do happy hours much...that was work out time so id be ready for 9:00, time to make a drink!!!

Where did you get coffee?
i hate coffee...SONIC DRINKS!!!

Favorite Year of Halloween?
tash, lauren didnt dye her hair pink till mardi gras..but it definitely was awesome. and she made a badass punk...i have to say i was a way hotter punk in DC with the wig (and where i wasnt standing next to lauren) but that was stll a good one...better than tony the tiger & the cop or ....what did we do senior year?

Go see a play or been in one?
yep

Did you ever have a job at school?
Texas A&M Rec

What did you hate about your college?
parking & the whole red ass thing, i never quite got that - agreed

What did you love most about it?
the people, my old roomies, rec friends, business kids, NOT writing papers, the fact that my parents still paid for everything, standing in the kitchen bullshitting with my roomies, adding pictures to the bulletin board, going over what happened the night before after going out, Sig Ep parties, boy drama (before everyone started getting married)

Ever leave to go on a road trip, where?
LA & AK to campaign, to Dallas for a Limp Bizkit concert and gay club with Cathrine, to austin with megan and brian, to Dallas for a party at the strip club (mmm fireman) with the freshman girls, to austin with tasha to try out for the Apprentice, to Dallas with Alicia and tasha to go to the luau party we got booted from, Galveston with Lauren, San Antonio with fellows

Where would you believe is the best location to live in?
definite good call on the exchange at luther st; and i had the two coolest roommates in CS so that helped, too

Graduated or still attending?
Graduated and moved on to....less green pastures

Year of graduation?
May 2004

Will you go back?
soo weird that I hardly know anyone there anymore...theres a conference there i might be taking a paper too, though

How many parking tickets have you gotten there?
i think i only got one at blinn

Finally, ever gotten arrested?
nope...i did, however, meet tasha for the first time immediately following said MIP...

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Sat, 11 Feb 2006 13:41:46 GMT

finally hit a wave of productivity. > 35 sources in the reference list at last check, right at about 30 pages...yessssss.

don't know why i'm currently obsessed with this song by annie. it's keeping me upbeat as i'm glued to my press conference transcripts and lit review. those of you sad to see the two princes leave myspace, i'm sure they'll be back. you can only take this 'bubble gum' pop for so long. im so funny. seriously, though, good song.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Wed, 08 Feb 2006 04:10:40 GMT

life is kicking my ass. im too tired to kick back.

Aaghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

tension breaker. had to be done.

Sunday, February 05, 2006

Sun, 05 Feb 2006 18:00:10 GMT

Random things Butt and tash's posts made me think of:

we threw some bad ass parties - even if they always ended with cops, trash can punch stains or pissed off UPS guys with overgrown eyebrows
one time tash stayed in bed the entrie time the maintenance dude was fixing her vent and made me get all ths shit for him - I thought she was being lazy; turns out she wasnt wearing underwear
Lauren hadn't ever played the penis game so we had a badass game our first night in melrose -- "okay, so I'm a whore now"
dunked my ring in a pitcher of beer in 36 seconds! my mom was pissed; my dad had to pretend he wasn't proud
Jake gave me the 6ft penis for my 20th birthday - by far the biggest dick in the apartment...well unless Chris was over. fucker.
'memer that dude from the SAE house that kept saying he wanted to come over for "banana pudding"? haha man, he was dumb - but, shit, the kid had phenomenal abs.
Tash spent the night at Malcom's...she's "all that and a bag a chips"...ha then she found out how old he was :)
Greg called me a bitch in front of like 10 people at the Sig Ep house. I was pissed. The fight secretly turned me on. shh dont tell.
tash totally dated jacob epseranza.
got kicked out of Third fFoor on Big Bro night for being too drunk....somehow got home with a salt shaker and a margartia glass....rachel definitely found me on the 4th floor screamig cuz someone moved my room (I lived on the 3rd floor)
don't worry lauren, you did look good in animal print. okay, so we looked like we were 16. whatever.
Pete asked me out first :) HA
hooked up wth Tony the Tiger on Halloween freshman year. it was NOT grrrrreat
the night of the dragon. enough said.
sorry about throwing up in the cab on your birthday and getting us stranded on a random street corner in L.A., Butt....but, free liquid cocaine shots in the VIP room with two fine ass guys'll do that to you, i guess....remember the black light salon...that was weird
threw up at Tash's bachelorette party too....hot picture of my kneeling in the bathroom at Lush...somehow decided to wipe my mouth with my shirt....and never put it back on. high five. sorry, tash.
Mike, Derek and Ben came to see me in DC for my 21st...Derek hooked us up with a hot apt on Pennsylvania Ave; we went to karaoke and saki bombs at Cafe Japone....$300 later I made out with Derek (pretty sure Max hates me for that...BUT I STILL SAY WE WERE ALREADY BROKEN UP), was completely hung over for our private tour of the White House the next day; Derek was pretty damn close to throwing up in the Oval Office
I was convinced that we could win the million bucks for finding the DC sniper so I ran around shaking trees
Colgate kama sutra! you'd be surrpised the fun you can have with a few gold schlagger shots and a body pillow
mmmm Denver at Lauren's beach house in Galveston. I came home with bruises. And not in a bad way.
Lauren, the guys and I told the campers next to us we were strippers at the Frio River. "Do you like the way I shake it in my thong, ooo wee?"
Tash, Crystal and I drove to Dallas to go to the party Maverick's Guy was throwing....only to be turned away for being underage. So, we went to the gay club and worked it on the dance floor with a coked out brotha.
THE SURPRISE FOR TASHA UNDER THE HOODIE AT OZ DURING MARDI GRAS. Tasha, why are you screaming?
bitchiest thing i said in college: "way to only include pictures of yourself on Ring Day, Tasha." (Lauren and I didnt get our rings on her ring day....oops)
dude, i totally just remembered asking that dude out at Kay Bee toy store when i bought the gun and handcuffs for my cop costume...HAHA he was fine....too bad he was there when i got thrown out of Third Floor
Tash got on stage on her 21st birthday, grabbed a fistful of cash from their tip jar yelling "let's get a drink" and headed to the bar....last thing she said to us before she left..."i fucking hate you all"

We must admit we were really pissed

Cuz Cupid took his shot and missed

Fortunately it wasn''t long,

Cuz damn these jello shots are strong.

Friday, February 03, 2006

Fri, 03 Feb 2006 17:40:16 GMT

** I just realized it seems a bit rediculous to complain about gaining weight while all the while admitting that i just downed two days worth of food from one box of cereal. i promise that's unusual.

100 RANDOM FACTS:

My middle name is kate.
My eyes are brown.
I’m 5’8.
I love the color of my hair.
My eyes have an ‘oriental flare’.
I never leave the house without eyeliner.
Sometimes I eat till I’m so full I have to go to sleep.
Now is one of those times. Ugh.
I have a wicked case of insomnia lots of the time.
I’m not shy at all.
I have a killer (sad?) obsession with Jason’s Deli.
I cannot eat Honey Bunches of Oats without finishing the whole box.
The lady with the shrill voice that says “are you huuuungry” on the Honey Bunches of Oats commercials pisses me off because I know even if I’m not I could eat that whole box.
I love postsecret.com. My favorite is ‘Sometimes When I’m Angry I Write Cuss Words on My Toaster Strudel’ (paraphrased).
I got LASIK a year and a half ago and it’s the best thing ever.
The meds I’m on are making me fat. I’m not handling it well.
I have pretty feet.
I love pedicures.
My brother kicks ass.
So do my parents.
My mom’s name is Peggy Sue Grant Billingsley. I think this kicks ass because all of our names are in hers. (My brother’s name is Grant, and my dad’s is Bill.)
I was the president of the NHS in high school. We won a shitload of awards and I’m still proud of it. (Is that sad?)
I used to think that Aggies were ridiculous. I’m still scared of a lot of the hard-core Ags, but I loved it there.
Flaxseed oil helped me have long nails. I like ‘em.
I love What Not to Wear.
I miss heels.
I love my hair stylist. I think he wants to date my brother.
I think Vince Vaughn is sexy.
I love my red silk duvet.
Living alone has allowed me to appreciate alone time.
If I ever found out people were recording me secretly I’d be super pissed.
I love getting and sending cards.
I should be working on my thesis right now.
Today is my grandmother’s 75^th birthday.
People like to talk to me.
I don’t believe that because technology has made me accessible at almost any time, I am obliged to be accessible at any time.
I don’t think that screening calls is rude. It doesn’t mean I don’t like you, or even that I don’t want to talk to you. It just means I want to talk to you later. Or, I’m not in the talking mood. Or, I just ate a box of cereal and I’m on such bad carb overload that I think I’ll vomit if I start talking. J
I live in Louisiana until I get my master’s degree on May 19^th.
I actually feel really educated now.
I can write a 20 page paper in one day. It hurts, but I can do it.
I work much better under pressure.
Vicodin doesn’t work on me.
I think I would kick ass on The View.
I can’t wait to get back to Texas.
I can find a Clueless quote that’s appropriate for any situation.
I love pumpkin brownies.
I like broccoli, cauliflower, carrots and water chestnut mixes.
I didn’t know what King Cake was till I moved to Baton Rouge. It’s good.
I lived here for almost a year before I knew that Baton Rouge meant “Red Stick.”
I like men with broad shoulders and big chests.
I think shoulders and calves are sexy.
I want to marry someone that likes holidays.
I’m not concerned about falling in love and getting married. I know it’s in my future.
I am very freaked out about the idea of being pregnant. So not looking forward to it.
I can’t believe Rob and Lauren ended up together. Totally didn’t see that coming. Total sitcom situation. But so happy for it!
People tell me and my friend Crystal that we look like sisters when we go out.
I’m starting to like “easy listening” music better than, like, Limp Bizkit’s Break Stuff.
I’m on #58 and I still want to throw up.
My mom, dad, brother and I go to Jason’s Deli for lunch when I’m home and stay there for hours eating ice cream and talking.
I love when people know you so well they can order for you.
Lauren = Buttface, I’m Beavis.
I check my email and my facebook about 800 times a day. It’s either that or writing my thesis.
I like American history.
I think I look hot in business casual.
I am a total American Eagle girl.
I love bracelets.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE getting flowers. I am so lucky to have friends that send them.
I like people with fun personalities. Laid back. Fun. Easy going.
I love when you get in great conversations with interesting people. You cannot force good conversation.
I’m still good friends with a lot of the people I was in PAL with in middle school. I love that.
I love that Elisabeth and her mom still throw the annual ‘Mother/Daughter Christmas Tea’.
I procrastinate like a mother.
I love the Black Eyed Peas. I should be paid for promoting Monkey Business.
I had my lip pierced for like a month in undergrad. Sometimes I wish I still had it.
I love when you meet someone for lunch/dinner and it turns into hours long conversation.
I love surprises. Unless they’re bad ones.
I want you to want me.
I hate the rut I’m stuck in in Baton Rouge.
I think everyone has something impressive about them. Right now, I have an impressive case of carb overload.
When I was in high school my dad always said, “You won’t remember these people in 30 years anyway.” Apparently, his generation didn’t have facebook.
I had a harder time letting go of anger towards two people from middle school than anything since.
Punk guys turn me on sometimes. If I’ve had a couple Vodka Diet’s I might think the dude in eyeliner is sexy.
I have a total fantasy about one of the partner’s at an agency I worked for last summer. His shirts were always so starched and perfectly tucked in. I want to crumple them up.
I think my arms are hot.
I have small boobs. I don’t mind anymore. At least they’re perky.
I interviewed New Orleans evacuees for a study after Katrina. Talk about a wake up call. That was sad. It was good experience for me.
I get irritable and boring when my blood sugar is low.
I love working out. I love the atmosphere at the gym. I hate that I can’t do it. I hate that I was in such good shape a year ago and now the doctors wont let me do anything. I hate it. So much. L
I’m so much better about confrontation than I used to be. Not that I’m adversarial. I’m just not so passive.
I hate when people are mad at me. But, I realize now that a little ‘mad’ doesn’t mean a relationship is doomed.
My friends kick ass.
Mike and Josh made me love Swedish Fish. If nothing else, they make me think of them.
I’ll try almost anything once.
I feel really lucky for livin with Tash and Lauren in the apartments we did in undergrad. Lived, worked and played together. And it kicked ass.
I loved the semester I spent in DC. Me and the foreign kids got along super well. The German dudes were the horniest, the French girls were the most fun, the Latin girls had the guys drooling. The South American’s had a totally hard time not having that after-lunch siesta. Just one girl’s cultural observations.
I’m still friends with my professor from that program in DC. He’s from Sierra Leone and kicks ass.
The random advertising dude I met at a marketing panel I wasn’t even planning on going to junior year was more helpful than almost anyone else I knew in college.
I helped start the largest chapter of the American Business Women’s Association in the country. We were in Women in Business magazine.
I’m proud of my resume.
I’m impressed if you’re still reading. I’m probably still not going to go work on my thesis.

Friday, February 03, 2006

Fri, 03 Feb 2006 05:48:58 GMT

friends are so important. i think there's some quote out there about friends being God's gift to each of us. I'm sure I could find it if I looked hard enough but I'm kind of over the whole 'research' thing. Anyway, since I'm pretty sure that no one reads this besides my good friends, thanks for being so freakin bad ass. its amazing how many different ways there are to be awesome.

ive always said my biggest fear was being insignificant. i guess, growing up, I meant something along the lines of doing something great, or being really successful or prominent in my career. Last night I realized that I would be almost offended if any of my good friends thought they were leading insignificant lives solely based on the impact they have on mine.

Every relationship with another person shows you something new. Thanks for the part you play in my life.

"...and in the end, maybe we're all just here to eat each other's cooking and say that it was good."

Thanks, Kev.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Thu, 02 Feb 2006 23:51:17 GMT

hello.

so i'm not going to post about things 'real life' right now, as far as what's going on and day-to-day happenings. I hurt, the meds suck, I can't stop gaining weight, etc etc. Things blow right now. But, I also need reasons to avoid working on my thesis and I've avoided this for too long. so...

5 things i am thankful for:

- my friends - i have some pretty incredible people in my life...even if i dont see most of them most of the time....

- my futon - it's a comfortable place to watch nick at night when i can't sleep

- cortisone shots - i wish i could have more and theyre making me fat, but at least i dont feel like shooting myself when it's working

- the new photo options on facebook - looking at everyone's pictures is such a good way to avoid working without having to justify walking away from the computer

- the passage of time - no matter what, i get to leave lsu in may

I can't even think of anything else to write.

I threw up three times today. you'd think with all the vomitting i do, i wouldnt be gaining weight. but, im even getting 'round-face' now. supposedly, thats because of the meds and the steroids. they told me to expect it. sometimes, even expecting something doesnt make coping with it any easier.

tasha and lauren are both talking about buying houses in the near future. thats awesome. i just want a badass loft in dallas.

im gonna stop wirting. i dont even know why im gonna post this.

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Tue, 06 Dec 2005 20:43:46 GMT

So, I put the picture of Coach Paul waking me up on my 22nd birthday wearing nothing but a sombrero on my facebook profile. Everyone from A&M and home are all laughing with me and making fun of me for making out with Edgar the UPS guy. Lauren's such a big pimp that her little brother's football coach came down from Houston for my birthday party. Apparently, he dug the fiesta. Funny thing is...everyone here (Baton Rouge) is all shocked and surprised. "Wow, I didn't expect that from you." I keep getting all these comments and people being like all "holy shit, susan and a naked man."

So, I'm thinking about it and talking to these people about it because, naturally, I'm shocked that they're shocked. These people have such a fucked up view of me. I'm like goody-goody-4.0-paper-writing Susan instead of chug-a-pitcher-of-beer-in-35-seconds, makin-money-for-3-waying-with-my-roommates, red-dragon Susan. And dammit, I miss that version. I just kind of assumed everyone here knew that chick was laying dormant while all this damn grad school shit took over for sec.

well fucking a. this is just not cool. I am 24 and people are all weirded out that there is a boy standing next to me with a sombrero on his junk. Perhaps I wont tell them about our group piercings in Padre or the law student with the foot fetish in the hotel room next to Lauren. I am fun, you fuckers. You know what this means, right? this means I gotta reintroduce some old-school into my life. That's what breaks are for...making sure you don't lose yourself to the bullshit. And so, I'm going to put my head down and be what Baton Rouge expects of me for one more week. Then fuck all this. I'm just gonna have to do some shit and take pictures that'll shock this crowd.

Tasha, tell razor im comin home